I think the biggest struggle is this:
Because of the slight mania, the bipolar, the constant ups and downs,
I don't know what was real.
Were the words real? The promises? The pleas?
I don't think a smile could be fake- not that one,
not the way her eyes crinkled and danced all at once,
or the way her cheeks looked like the might split.
I don't remember how many times I saw that smile,
but obviously it wasn't enough.
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2 comments:
I totally know what you mean -- that questioning.
The best thing to do, I've found, is not to figure out what moments were "real" or not and instead redefine your perception of "reality.'
I like that.
I just hope I'm strong enough to start doing it.
Like, now.
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